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Play Hard To Get

February 3, 2012 By Christian Thorne

Play Hard To Get

business-man-and-womanThink back to a time when you were a little kid and a relative or friend gave you a new toy. When you would play with this new toy you really didn’t think too much about it. If the new toy were to break you may be sad but it’s not too big of a deal because you didn’t buy it anyway.

Now think to a time when you got allowance and if you wanted a new toy you had to work and save for weeks before you had the money to buy it. When you finally saved enough and had bought your new toy you respected it much more than the other toys you had gotten for free. You knew all the hard work you had to put in to be able to purchase it and therefore placed higher value on the toy you bought yourself.

The basic principal is the harder you have to work to get something the more value you place upon it. This same principle can be applied to attracting women too. The easier you give in to a woman the less value she’ll give you, but the harder you are to get the more value she’ll place on you.

For example if you’re in a bar and a woman starts to flirt with you and right away you’re showing that you’re really into her, and acting like there’s no other woman for you, that’s going to set off some red flags for her because she knows that she didn’t put any real effort forth to attract you. But you still got really into her thus you must be a low value man who doesn’t get women and has to take the first one that comes along cause this doesn’t happen very often. She will lose attraction for you.

On the flip side if she starts to flirt with you and you flirt back (maybe tease her a little), after a while you get up and walk around the bar and talk to other women, you’re going to make her put forth some effort if she really wants to get you. When you do hook up with her she knows the work she had to put in to keep your attention so she then sees you as having higher value because you can be choosey about your women. You aren’t easily won over and you don’t just get on the first woman that comes along.

When you play hard to get with women you are sub- communicating to them that you already have women in your life and you don’t necessary need anymore. The funny part is when other women know that you already have women in your life it just makes them want you even more!

Leaders Get The Girls

January 23, 2012 By Christian Thorne

If you were on an airplane that crash-landed on a deserted island with fifty other people would you be a natural leader? How about when you’re out with your friends, are you one of the leaders of your group? If your answer to either of these was “no” you likely don’t have the choice you would like with women either.

Women are naturally programmed to seek out leaders. If you can show her that you are the leader of your group and/or establish yourself as an authority in her world you will get massive attraction. A leader will convey all characteristics of confidence, which we’ve already discussed. Lets talk about what it is to be a strong leader.

You may have heard the expression, “Lead the men, and the women will follow”. You can convey that you are a natural leader by entering a group and gaining control of the interaction. This doesn’t mean talking over everyone in the group. If you are able to approach the group and gain the attention of everyone in the group you can convey that you are the leader. If you are telling an interesting story and everyone in the group is reacting to you, the women will subconsciously see you as a leader.

Many men misinterpret being a leader and think that they must dominate and lead everything. That is not what being a leader is all about. That just makes you come off as a socially awkward asshole! Don’t be that guy!

A strong leader makes others feel good about their positive attributes. You want others to feel like they are at their best when they are around you. When a leader gives a compliment he means it and it doesn’t come from a place of “suck up”.

As a leader you shouldn’t be concerned about power and authority but rather respect of the group. Realize that everyone in the group has value and bring that out in a way that makes others feel good about having you there.

When you are out with a woman you can show leadership by being decisive. Know what your plan is and make it happen without asking for permission. If an unexpected decision comes along don’t sit and hesitate, just do what you feel is right. Women like it when a guy is decisive and able to make quick decisions.

If leadership does not come naturally for you, realize it will take time to work on this. If you’ve already set a dynamic with a friend or group where they are clearly the leader and you try to take that roll they may take notice and not like it. It takes time to calibrate your leadership abilities but make it a high priority to do so in all current and future relationships.

 

Don’t Be Afraid To Escalate Sexually

January 16, 2012 By Christian Thorne

One of the biggest mistakes men make once they’ve been talking to a woman for awhile, and things seem to be going well, is they don’t escalate further than just having a normal conversation. Once things are going well many men don’t take things further because they don’t want to screw things up, or they don’t believe that the woman could really be into them.

When you don’t escalate things in a sexual nature you are communicating to the woman that you don’t want a sexual relationship with her. You’re conveying that you just want to be friends and you’re likely to hear the words “just friends”.

Once you’ve been placed in the friend zone it’s very hard to get out of and if you’re in the friend zone and try to escalate sexually it will just come off as weird. If you find yourself in the friend zone with a woman it is usually best to move on and be happy you’ve made a new friend.

To avoid the friend zone you want to make your intentions known very early in the interaction. You are a sexual being and so is she. Don’t be afraid to be a man and bring out the woman in her.

By making your intentions known to her you are communicating that you are an alpha male who’s not afraid to go for what he wants, this is very attractive to her.

There are tons of different ways to escalate in the interaction.

Here are just a few examples:

–  Communicate to her that she is sexy

–  Touch her

–  Tickle her

–  Kiss her

–  Make up pet names for her

–  Whisper things in her ear

–  When seated slowly start bringing your legs together so that they touch every so often.

If when you’re attempting to escalate and she seems a little distant it is probably because she doesn’t feel comfortable enough with you yet, so go back to normal conversation and try to escalate again later.

It’s important that if this does happen to not let it affect you, remember you are the confident alpha male that lives in his own reality and nothing bothers you. A woman wants to be picked up, but she wants you to do it. She’s not just going to hand her self over to you this is why it is so important to ESCALATE!

Men often pre-occupy themselves with trying to figure out if a woman is in to them. There are tons of subtle little things a woman will do while talking to you to let you know that she is interested in you sexually. Such as playful touching, flipping her hair, putting on lip-gloss, and the list goes on and on.

Rather then being to concerned at looking for these cues it’s a better practice to always assume it’s on, or always assume she’s into you and you can escalate in a sexual nature at any time. This is a better way of thinking for a couple different reasons.

  1. If you are always looking for cues that’s she’s into you, you can become to involved in looking for these cues and you’ll come off as you’re seeking to get something from her.
  2. When you always assume it’s on you are implanting in your head that all women want you and they have no choice but to be into you. What you believe to be true will become true.

So now that you know you need to escalate there is one more thing to keep in mind. When escalating in a public venue, such as a bar or club, you want to make sure to not escalate to far, to far meaning going past making out and going to arousal. Escalating this far can cause regret. Then she will associate those bad feelings toward you. Wait till you get to a private location before taking it to that level.

Here are some other key points to keep in mind when escalating:

Kissing or making out in a club is not a big deal to women. Often times an attractive woman will have multiple make outs every weekend she goes out and has kissed thousands of guys over her lifetime. Once you start thinking this way you will notice how incredibly easy it is to get a make out in the club.

Just because you got a make out doesn’t mean you’re going to get her number or hang out with her later, you just made out with her that’s it.

It is possible to have sex with a woman the same night you meet her. What you believe can happen will happen. There is no set amount of time a woman takes to decide to have sex with you. Once you display the right characteristics to her and she feels she knows the real you she will be ready for sex. She may take a week before she is ready with one man or she could be ready that night if a man is able to flip enough of her attraction switches.

Many men feel they need to wait to have sex with a woman in fear of disrespecting her or ruining their chances of becoming her boyfriend this is total bullshit! Having sex with a woman quickly will not ruin the chance of a future relationship with her! Actually if you have more of a chance of losing her if you get her to the point of being ready and wanting sex and not pulling the trigger!

Looking Good Can Get You Laid

December 9, 2011 By Christian Thorne

StyleWhile physical appearance is not the most important factor of attraction to women, it is part of the overall package. There are things that are under your control in your physical appearance and these include style and grooming.

The single most important part of having style is to be able to stand out from the crowd and be congruent with it. What I mean by congruent is your style has to fit with your personality. For example, if you’re a doctor or a lawyer you’re probably not going to go out dressed like a punk rocker. You wouldn’t be congruent with that image.

You need to look at yourself and figure out what kind of image you want to portray. Know that if you dress gothic you’re probably going to attract more gothic girls. If you’re going for that punk rock girl it helps to have a little rocker edge to your style.

So how do you stand out from the crowd? Your work clothes are your work clothes. Go and buy some clothes specifically for going out. When going out you want to show that you have style and that you can stand out in a unique fashion. Women notice when you’re wearing something different from everyone else.

Typically if you’re dressed different you will have to put up with more social pressure. Guys might come up and tease you on what you’re wearing. This is why a lot of guys dress the same. They can’t take social pressure or stand up for their individuality. Being able to take social pressure is an attractive quality to women because it shows that you’re a strong male and can stand up for yourself and thus will be able to stand up for her and protect her.

Get something that’s a little different from the norm. The polo shirt is not a good shirt for picking up chicks. Get something that is unique that women will notice and start a conversation with you by asking about it. You’ll be amazed how often this can happen.

Shop somewhere besides department or trendy mall stores. Every city has little unique shops where you can find lots of cool gear. Get a city guide and find the shops in your area. If you travel often buy unique items from different cities.

Always try clothes on. They may look good on the rack but may look like hell on you.

One of the best things you can do is take a woman shopping with you. Women have great sense of style and can be a big help. Women are very observant. They notice the little things.

Accessorizing is a great way to stand out. Get a couple rings and necklaces to wear out. Get a stylish pair of shoes or boots. Boots in particular are good because not everyone wears boots and they will also give you a little height.

If you wear glasses consider getting contacts or laser surgery. If you insist on glasses, but they haven’t been updated since the stone ages, get some new frames.

Instead of going for a $9.99 haircut at the generic barber shop, go for the salon haircut that may cost you a little bit more but is worth it. They will be able to match a haircut with your facial features and it will really show. Don’t be afraid to throw a little color in too.

While you’re at the salon consider getting excess hair waxed. Wax your eyebrows to even them up and prevent unibrow. If you have excess hair on your back, chest, and stomach consider waxing those areas as well. These are personal decisions as some women like their men hairy. Younger generations of women tend to like their men groomed with less body hair.

Women make an effort to smell nice for their men. Return the favor by getting some designer cologne. This is something else that is nice to have a woman’s opinion on. Women tend to be the ones selling designer colognes so you can get her opinion on it before buying. Cologne smells different on different people depending on the oils on your skin so make sure you know what it smells like on you. It may smell nice on the test paper but once you mix it with the oils on your skin it might smell different.

Always keep your nails at the very least trimmed. If you really want them nice go for a manicure. Women do a lot of grooming to their bodies so keep in mind that what a woman does to herself she will take notice to on men. Not to say that you have to become some girly man, just don’t look like a slob.

Attraction Formula

November 21, 2011 By Christian Thorne

“The Truth Behind Female To Male Attraction”Attraction Formula

What I’m about to share with you is going to change the way you think about attracting women and open up an entirely new world of opportunity for you.

Once you understand these concepts and learn how to apply them you might even smack yourself in the face for not noticing these things before. Don’t give yourself a hard time, 99% of men are clueless about these concepts.

This article is about Female to Male attraction, but before I get into the heart of this topic I want to take a quick second to talk about Male to Female attraction so we can compare and contrast the two to give you a better understanding.

What attracts a Man to a Woman is obvious but it’s important that we compare this with what attracts Women to Men so that you can see that there is a significant difference in the two.

If I were to ask you to make a list of what you find attractive in a woman, what would you write down?

I want you to be brutally honest with me here. Don’t avoid writing tits and ass to try to be wholesome and nice!

I’m talking about a supermodel walking in the room, and you feel instant attraction. What attracts you to her?

I think the most honest list we would see would look something like this:

Breasts
Butt
Hips
Beautiful Facial Features
Hair
Youth
And other physical qualities

Men are hard wired to be attracted to a woman’s physical qualities. Men decide within SECONDS of seeing a woman whether or not they are attracted.

Admit it, you see a hot girl walking across the room and you feel a powerful attraction before you’ve even spoken a word to her! This is OK, we are supposed to be that way!

Men are evolutionarily programmed to seek out attractive females because they have the highest chance of producing the strongest and most attractive offspring, therefore giving our genes a better chance of being passed on.

In most cultures this is very obvious common knowledge stuff. Why else would women spend thousands of dollars on beauty supplies, diets, clothes, surgery, and other things to make themselves beautiful?

Women do this kind of stuff to make themselves more physically attractive, so they can be attractive to the opposite sex, therefore giving them more mates to choose from.

Ok, so maybe I haven’t told you anything you don’t already know yet. But now that we have Male to Female attraction more clearly defined, we can take a look at Female to Male attraction, which is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!

“What Attracts Women To Men Is Not So Obvious, But If You Understand This You Can Flip Any Woman’s Attraction Switches…”

I want you to take a minute and come up with a list of all the things you think women are attracted to in men.

Now write these qualities women find attractive in men down in a list like we did above. This is a harder one isn’t it?

When I ask men this question, these are some of the common qualities I will see on their lists:

Looks
Nice
Money
Tall
Handsome
Romantic
Great Abs
Gentleman
Chiseled facial features
Muscles
Chivalry

Did you see any of these things on your list? If you did you can begin smacking yourself because these things have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH ATTRACTION!

Some of you might not believe me yet. This is because we’ve been socially conditioned through popular media such as book, movies, magazines, television, and internet to believe that these things are what women look for in a man.

While it makes a good fairytale story in movies, it unfortunately gives men the wrong idea about attracting women!

I know what some of you doubters are thinking now. If you ask a woman what she is attracted to what do you think she would say?

She would probably say something like, “I like a tall man, with a nice stomach, cute face, nice muscles, who treats me like a gentleman.”

I bet if you took this same hypothetical woman we are generalizing about and looked at the men she has dated or slept with, they would be nothing like what she described above.

The reason is because what a woman LOGICALLY thinks she wants in a man is NOT what she EMOTIONALLY responds to!

Now we’re getting somewhere! Read the line above ten times out loud so your subconscious hears it.

This is incredibly important for you to understand. A woman’s attraction switches are in her emotions, not in her logic!

Think about the standard approach most men have with women. They walk up, introduce themselves, and start asking logical questions like “What’s your name?”, “Where are you from?”, “What do you do?”

Engaging a woman like this will NOT spark attraction because you are approaching her logically. You need to learn how to approach her on an emotional level so you can flip her emotional attraction switches!

“So How Do You Flip These Emotional Switches?”

Earlier we talked about how men become attracted to a woman within seconds of seeing her. The same is not true about a woman’s attraction to men.

Women take minutes if not hours to decide if they are attracted to a man and attraction can fluctuate up and down at any time during your interactions with her.

Furthermore physical characteristics have little, if not nothing, to do with a woman’s attraction towards a man. Female to Male attraction is very different in the fact that women are hard wired differently.

Women are evolutionarily hard wired to seek out dominant males. Dominant males offer survival value, which is good for the survival of herself and her offspring. This increases the chances of her genes being passed on.

This does not mean you have to be a big hulky male to get women. In fact it’s quite the opposite. Any man can learn to convey these characteristics and gain attraction very quickly from any woman.

In seeking out dominate males women look to the following when judging attraction:

Women are hard wired to be attracted to a man’s behavioral cues.

PLUS

Women read social cues to see how others are reacting towards that man.

With that said, if we were to go back to our list of qualities women are attracted to in men it would change to be something more like this:

Confidence
Leadership
Humor
Tonality
Body Language
Comfort in your environment
Ability to stand out
Liked by other women
Indifference to what other people think
Boundaries of what you will accept from others
Control over your emotions and your reality
And more…

These are characteristics that are sub-communicated through behavior and social cues that women become attracted to!

Notice you don’t see anything about physical qualities, money, age, or being a nice guy!

Have you ever seen a woman with a man and wondered “why is she with that guy?”

Maybe the guy is 6 inches shorter than her, maybe he’s fat, maybe he’s 15 years older, or maybe he treats her like crap, but for “some reason” she is attracted to him.

That “some reason” is because this man has attracted her emotionally by sub-communicating attraction to her!

The same holds true as to why women are attracted to “bad boys”. It’s because these men automatically flip the right attraction switches for her!

I’m not saying that you have to be a bad boy or not be nice to women. You can sub-communicate the right qualities and flip these same switches without having to be a jerk to women!

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